Is Fear Blocking You from Your Strengths?

cowardly lionWe all have natural strengths and talents and when we spend the lion’s share of our time and energy engaged in activities that bring out those strengths and talents, most of us will be much more successful and certainly more fulfilled.

But are you letting fear block you from your strengths?

You may not even realize it. In my coaching practice, I’m working with clients every day to go after and attain what they truly desire in their life. Sometimes repeated efforts without results is simply a matter of needing a better strategy but that’s rare.

Two of the most common reasons for not attaining what you truly desire are:

1) Going after goals that are not aligned with your strengths and/or

2) Allowing fear to block you from a relentless pursuit of your goals.

So how do you handle both of these. For #1 — Take the Strengths Assessment and then honestly evaluate what you are up to. Make sure the majority of your goals are primarily aligned with your natural strengths – it’ll make a huge difference.

Now how to overcome fear…

One of my favorite techniques (and there are many) is what I coined “Natural Affirmations.” This was one of the primary techniques I used in overcoming my phobia of public speaking. You may have heard of affirmations or incantations as a method for reinforcing and/or directing your unconscious mind to create what you want. Those can work but I’ve found this simple twist on affirmations to be much more effective.

Here’s how I used Natural Affirmations to overcome my phobia of public speaking and I really do mean phobia. Everyday for three weeks (would have done it longer if I had needed to) I pretended to have already overcome the phobia. Instead of standing in front of a mirror and saying ten times “I love public speaking” — which for me feels a little unnatural — periodically throughout the day, several times a day I would say things like… “I’m so happy I overcame that silly phobia.” “It’s awesome that I enjoy public speaking so much now.” “I’m so proud of myself that I put that behind me.” “Gosh, I wish someone would call me and invite me to do some speaking.” “I just freakin’ love getting up in front of people now.” The idea is to talk to yourself the way you really would if you had already accomplished the goal hence, Natural Affirmations. 

A couple of nuances… 1) It’s critical that you say it like you mean it!  That means say it with conviction, excitement, energy, playfulness, etc. 2) You most likely won’t believe it or feel congruent at first. When I first started saying those things the little voice in my head would say, “Bullshit” (or some equivalent).  After a couple of weeks the little voice timidly mused, “It really might be kind of cool to do some public speaking.” And by week three, the little voice (which was now a lot stronger) declared, “I really am excited to get up in front of people and do this!”

It’s a process but it’s so incredibly worthwhile in freeing you up to identify, maximize and master your strengths!

Spread the word,
Debra

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